1. Do you ever think "I wish I was jewish"?*
2. Do you ever think "if I was a dog I would just bite everyone's legs all the time"?**
3. Do you ever see something very weird or hear something very weird, and instead of going "that's weird", do you ever think "oh GREAT, I've had a STROKE"?***
* This is because last night Em said she liked Ed Miliband because he was the child of Jewish immigrants.
** This is because I saw a horrible dog scrabbling frantically the wrong way up the escalator last night, and I sort of wriggled past it with my legs TINGLING because they were so sure they were going to be bitten.
*** This is because yesterday I saw this little boy with a fox's head walk past me, and I thought Oh God This Is It. But really it was only a little boy with a horrifically realistic fox mask on.
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well what did he say? did he say sometimes he wishes he was stroking a jewish dog?
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